Why Brett Favre Won’t Be The Next Mr. Jenn
1) He’s difficult on purpose. For example:
a. I’m retired. No I’m not. Okay, yes I am. Wait. No. Noyes? Yeno? Yes. Ugh. NO. Sorry. That’s my final answer.
… or is it?
b. Favre vs. Farve. Why not spell it like you say it?! Or why not have an easy name like Smith, Jones or Skarsgard. Jennifer Fav-reh? Jennifer Farve. Either way it looks stupid.
2) Smug face.
3) He played for Green Bay, who, by the way, are my mortal enemies. My arch nemesis. The Kenickie to my Danny. The Megatron to my Optimus Prime. There’s no Shakesperean love story turned Taylor Swift song here folks. I’m not too fond of the Vikings either.
4) Our song would be “Should I Stay Or Should I Go?” by The Clash. I’d refuse to acknowledge that and then he would leave me. But come back only to leave again. And come back.
… or would he?
5) Most importantly: I could never date a football player because of the jockstraps* they wear under those white pants. Yes, I can see them boys. I can’t help but giggle. I don’t know if I want to smack it or pull back on a strap and let-er-rip!
(Don’t ask what I had to Google to find that picture. Most disturbing: that is a man’s arm.)
And I’m spent.
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Skarsgard? LOL I love how you brought the very delicious true blood sheriff into this post. Rawr.
I think the jock strap makes middle school humiliation from the bad boys worth it. Remember how some of them liked snapping bra straps and embarassed us? It’s payback time!
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Other than the jock strap thing, you made some valid points.
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I don’t even watch football, but I agree with you on all points.
Vanessa´s last blog ..Apprehensions Be Damned!
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Seriously, that picture just made my morning.
Lindsay´s last blog ..Ball of Nerves
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he wont be the next Mr. Jenn because he will be the next Mr. Blaez.
i love me some Brett, I could gobble in him up! he’s my man!
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Hell yeah I would pull that strap! *SMACK*
Courtney Gavran´s last blog ..Fashion Emergency: The "Child Mohawk" is Not OK
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haha this is too funny. brett would definitely be one difficult guy to date that’s for sure, way too indecisive!
katelin´s last blog ..The wolves are taking over Hollywood.
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I’m pretty sure you would have fun with that No. 5 reason.
Lollygagger´s last blog ..OCD.
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You do like vikings…. Eric? Yeah, I thought so.
Jock straps make me laugh, too.
Ms. Salti/Erica´s last blog ..Last Weekend in Review
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I’m pretty sure #4 is my favorite. And I agree on his last name =)
Nora´s last blog ..Lilies & Love Giveaway
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As far as the jockstrap goes, you gotta do what you gotta do.
Favre is a tool and I can’t believe the Vikings are gonna pay him that much money. They must expect a huge increase in attendance.
Paul
strugglingwriter´s last blog ..Why Do You Want To Be Published?
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oh my goodness, this is too funny! I was just talking to my boyfriend recently about how I CANNOT STAND Brett Favre’s last name. like you said, why can’t you spell it like you say it!?!? every time I see his name, I think Fav-reh, and then in my head I correct myself, and then I want to scream because it bugs me that. much. I don’t know why it bugs me so, but it does. it’s my pet peeve. ok, done venting. just glad I’m not alone
Carissa´s last blog ..A life’s ambitions
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I don’t have a dog in this fight (go Panthers!) but I hope the Bears, Packers, and even the Lions sack Bret Favre back into retirement. Him and his smug “I didn’t want to go training camp” grin.
TOPolk´s last blog ..Just A Friend
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i am hardly a football fan, but i do live in the state of the vikings…we’ve spent a lot of time hating him! it’s weird to have him on our team now. i’m not that excited about it.
willikat´s last blog ..On Quitting
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Well said. Good call on the Clash song! I’m a little bit ticked I didn’t think of it.
TheGuy´s last blog ..Pseudo Symphony
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