I’m not fat; You’re stupid

After spending some time feeling unhappy about my current diet and lack of activity, I decided to enjoy some hula hooping and boxing on my Wii. 

It’s definitely been a while since I picked up a Wiimote because all the batteries were dead. After replacing everything, I hopped on the balance board, ready to girate my pelvis into a size four. I was greeted with the standard, “Hey, it’s been X-many days since you’ve worked out.” Yeah, thanks for the guilt. I decided to torture myself and check my weight and BMI. My BMI wasn’t bad; it’s still within the normal range. I’d be lying if my weight stayed the same for 150+ days. 

Instead of a simple, “Hey, you weigh this much, let’s get to work!” It was like, “Hey, you’re heavy. First step off of me and second let’s choose a more attainable goal since you obviously suck when it comes to follow-through.” Wow…thanks for making me feel like a fat cow. I’m not going to lie, I’ve put on about 10 pounds since last summer. I’m not thrilled about it, but I don’t need a stupid balance board yelling at me. 

So I did what any sane geek would do: I turned on Wii boxing and punched the shit out of what I imagined was the Wii balance board. I won them all. Take that. 

No wonder I let the batteries die…

(Yeah…I can’t draw boxing gloves on Paint.)

Tagged as: body image, Dead batteries, Nintendo Wii, Wii Fit