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Down: I had to wake up at 5:30 a.m. to take my test.
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Up: I passed it. ::insert cheering and clapping here::
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Down: We’re supposed to get hit with 6-9 inches of snow.
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Up: Spring is on its way!
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Down: The boyfriend is suspiciously unsure if he wants me to come out to Atlanta on Friday. Sadly the tickets were bought a month ago, I’ve been looking forward to it and it’s a pretty cowardly/selfish move.
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Up: There’s really no “up” to that one…
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Down: My stomach is feeling all funky. I haven’t eaten much so I’m thinking it’s nerves or worse…
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Up: I’ll live
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Down: I have no idea what to blog about these days. All I want to do is vent.
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Up: I’ve crossed the 100,000 viewers threshold. Ah thank yah!
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Down: I’m still lacking personal space.
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Up: I found an apartment that sounds ideal. If all goes well, it might be mine.

Do you remember Sarah Silverman’s “gift” to Jimmy Kimmel? If not, please click here.
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Jimmy aired his revenge song last night. Click here for that one.
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Jimmy has endless celebrity cameos. But Sarah Silverman has Matt Damon. I’m having a difficult time choosing which one I enjoy more.

Only one secret today folks. This one kind of tugged on my heartstrings a bit. Be sure to check out the rest of this week’s secrets over at PostSecret.
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Do Angelina and Brad ever stop having sex? When will they have enough kids?
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Wallflower at the Orgy by Nora Ephron.
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Intern: A Doctor’s Initiation by Sandeep Jauhar.
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These will make a lovely addition to my bookshelves. I find that it is so difficult to walk into a bookstore and not leave with something. It’s also hard to put books down. I often end up carrying four to five books at a time trying to talk myself out of buying at least two of them. I try to remind myself to write down the names, go home and find them on Amazon. I don’t mind used copies. But sometimes I just haaave to have a certain book right then.
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Some will ask, “Jenn, if you read so many books, why not save some money and get a library card?” To this I would reply, “Because.” I like to own books. I like to write in the margins and fold the top corner of a page with a quote I like. I enjoy highlighting. I also like to give the book to someone who I think would enjoy it when I’m done. And to be quite honest, I just like seeing my bookshelves filled But I appreciate that person being so concerned about my finances.
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Please keep your fingers crossed for the following reasons:
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1. I have my NCBTMB exam on Monday. This is the test that will allow me to get my massage therapist license.
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2. I mailed in my application for an internship with a coroner’s office today. I want it. Badly.
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3. Da Bears will have another year with Grossman. Say goodbye to the Superbowl now Chicago. Bye-bye ::waves::
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Good vibes people, good vibes!

I love Passive-Aggressive Notes. I’m always on the look out for notes I can submit but sadly never find any. I’m not looking hard enough! Earlier this week I found a lovely collection of bathroom etiquette signs that I could not resist sharing. (I didn’t take these pictures. Kudos to GiggleSugar for providing them.)
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I prefer my bathroom doors to swing wide open mid-pee.
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Was this really necessary?!
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I’m feeling really bitter today. The whole “not knowing where I stand thing” and “why won’t you talk to me about this” thing are eating away at me. I did sleep last night though. The night before was a mess. I didn’t know if I was awake or asleep, but the thoughts kept pouring in. I was consumed by worries. Lucky for me my dreams were full of Scrabulous last night. It’s sad…but what can I say?
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I’m trying my best to stay in the moment and not worry that in the next few days, I’ll be told to cancel my flight out there. So instead of spending another day bitching about all this relationship drama, I thought I’d spare you all and tell you about things that are making my Friday an A-Okay day.
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- Girl Scout cookies. I haz dem. Nothing says “I’m okay” like shoving 16 chocolate covered peanut-butter cookies in your mouth.
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- Part two of Monk’s season finale is tonight. I love Monk. We’d make a great couple.
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- Come May I’ll be able to get a free upgrade on my phone. New phones make me happy.
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- Elmo wants to kill James. Always awesome.
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- I found this treasure of a video from ANTM with Jay Manuel looking all sorts of man fierce and Tyra being a drunken homecoming queen.
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- Here’s a fun website: Rules of Thumb. I once was told that the original “rule of thumb” was that back in the day, men couldn’t beat their wives with a stick any wider than their thumb. There’s a little fun fact for you all to digest.
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- How can a girl not squee about this. I’m a bit disappointed about the SATC trailer. Way to spoil the movie. So far Carrie gets stood up, Steve cheats, Charlotte is preggers and Samantha is Samantha. I do really enjoy the ending where Carrie says “And Cinderella and the Prince lived happily ever after. You know, things don’t always happen like this in real life. I just think you should know that now.” Thank you!!! I was just telling my mom how Disney gives women a false sense of romance! Eff’in Disney!
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- If Disney ruled things, I’d be wearing a big foofoo gown and my prince, aka The Boyfriend, would scurry over to Chicago and tell me he couldn’t live without me and never wants to move away. Then he’d place a brand new silver Blackberry Pearl in my hand. Oh! And uh, he’d bring some nachos because they’re really delicious and then we’d play Wii Bowling. ::sigh:: One can dream right?
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- For all the LOLcat fans out there I have a special treat. May I present to you the History of LOLcat. Ta da!

I had so much that I wanted to say tonight. During my ride home from therapy I was listing all these points I wanted to make and really thinking to myself that I should pull over and write these down before I forget them. Well, I didn’t pull over and that’s a shame because now I don’t remember everything. It was something along the lines of this:
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- I am strong because I’m allowing myself to feel these feelings, no matter how ugly or nasty they may be. I’m angry, confused, betrayed…and I accept them all. I am not a coward. I don’t judge them, analyze them or stop them. I’m walking into the eye of the storm and not pulling away.
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- I’m standing up and wanting to sort these feelings out, talk about things and confront the issues. I’m not hiding, avoiding or denying.
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- I am still trying to be a partner in this relationship because if I recall correctly, it isn’t over yet. Good partners support the other. They acknowledge each other and don’t play a push and pull game. Hearts are not ragdolls. The other is just as much affected by what’s going on.
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- This decision affects me. The distance affects me. The pulling away and distancing yourself from me, affects me. I’m as much involved as he. This will change my life, too.
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- I need to remain in the moment. I can’t get caught up in yesterday or what will happen two days from now. Remain in the moment, with those feelings and let them pass. When I am ready to make decisions, I’ll find the strength to do so.
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- I deserve respect, honesty and love. And it’s perfectly okay to acknowledge when I’m not receiving one or more.
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- I am feeling ignored. I feel like the relationship has ended and I didn’t even know about it. I feel like we can’t talk about it. I feel like the decision has been made and now it’s time to figure out how to “handle” me. I feel betrayed, led on. I feel conflicted about which role I should play. I’m not okay with this. I’m not okay saying I wish you the best and good luck. I’m not okay with this ending and I’m not okay that I haven’t been able to say any of this to him. I feel sad. I feel hopeful that maybe, just maybe he’ll realize how important I am to him. Then I feel foolish because all this time, he hasn’t seemed to realize it. I’m scared. I’m lonely. Him being distant is hurting more than the possibility of him moving…and I don’t even think he realizes it…
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- I feel that because I could have built my future around him, he will leave, because that scares him. How do you recover? No matter the decision, I’ll still love him. There will always be reminders about the relationship all around. I’ll be stuck with that. He’ll be off starting a new life and I’ll be here, forcing myself to get over him. I’m jumping ahead. Stay in the moment. We haven’t spoken yet, I don’t know what’s going to happen.
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- This is my outlet. I should not be ashamed of or censor my thoughts, feelings or fears.
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- Where’s one of those blingy band-aids when I need them? I hope they come in heart size.

- You HAVE GOT to be KIDDING: When will Speidi disappear? Don’t they realize that nobody in America takes them seriously? As if their horrendous music video fiasco didn’t give them enough grief, they decided to get their own video game. That’s right. I cannot believe that Electronic Arts agreed to this. Please tell me this is a bad dream.
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- Did you see the lunar eclipse last night? I did. I had a lovely view from the dining room window. I can’t remember the last time I actually saw the red moon. If you missed it, click here for a picture.
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- Why?: Bloody wound, meet band-aid bling. Band-aid bling, meet bloody wound. I actually really like the fancy-schmancy Ace bandages v 2.0. I’ll take one in yellow please!
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- So long human race: Hello Robots! As if technology couldn’t make people any lazier, may I introduce to you the Deli Touch pen. This bad boy allows you to order food without having to speak to a human. But unless they wire robots to bring you the food, you’ll be seeing at least one human being during your meal.
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- Crave of the Day: One item I’d gladly sell my kidney for AT&T Centro. I don’t know if I’m ready to make the move from Verizon to AT&T though. AT&T, let’s use this opportunity to entice me kay?
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- Sucks to be you: Exploding Laptop. I now have an irrational fear of my laptop spontaneously catching on fire and burning down the house.
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- Going too far: I don’t even want to talk about it. Just read for yourself.
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- Barry’s Farm has some really clever laptop sleeves. Once again, my birthday is in July \

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- If you haven’t already, I suggest checking out passive-aggressive notes. While looking through all the funniness today, I found one I could relate to. See Mom? I’m not the only one!

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Before I get to the model bashing, I must say that Jay Manuel was looking all sorts of delicious last night. If I were a gay man, I’d be all over him. Seriously, I’d lick him. I’m considering trying out for Cycle 11 just to be close to him. I can smile with my eyes Jay!!! ::picks dignity and composure up off floor:: Moving right along…
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Anya: I don’t like her. She’s pretty, but when she opens her mouth oh man I just can’t handle her.
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Claire is beautiful. I love her. However, I didn’t need to know that she was drinking her own breast milk. Filter please.
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Dominique. What?! They added a 14th spot for her? HER?! One, she looks like a man. Two, the “all this” crap, ugh. Get over yourself.
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Fatima is beautiful. I can’t wait to see what they do to her during the makeover episode. I’m a glutton for drama so I really enjoyed the girls fighting with her about being ghetto. Ahh…women….
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Kimberly. What does one say about her? “Oh do you want me to pose?” Uh, yeah…this is a modeling competition. It’s not called Stand & Stare at the Camera. And when asked about if she steals money from the bank she works at….OMG. She can’t seriously be that dumb can she?
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Lauren, Lord help her. I love that she’s different. But I don’t think she’s going to last very long.
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I don’t know how I feel about Stacy. Her voice bothers me.
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The others I really have no beef with. I am much more excited about this cycle than I was with cycle 9. Hooray! And I thoroughly enjoyed Tyra and the Jays making fun of almost every girl. Way to be a role model Tyra!
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P.S. Tyra scares me in the picture above.